just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
