I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
