It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
