I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
