All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
