So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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