I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
