brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Non-Jews are for practice
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
