but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
