This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Randomize
