I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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