I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize
