It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
