It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
