He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
