She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
