so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
My life is pants optional.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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