I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
