I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
