I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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