I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
