Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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