if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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