I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
