You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
