I bet he comes in French.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
