Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Randomize
