Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
