just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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