Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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