u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
