This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
