Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Everclear isn't food dammit
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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