And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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