just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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