it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
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