i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
