how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
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