you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
