i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I need water and some morals
Randomize