I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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