wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize