ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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