Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
It's never too late to be topless.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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