Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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