I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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