How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
