oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
