New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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