why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
